Archive: 2011

Trad bad?

24 March 2011
Charles
4 Comments
Categories: DIY funeral, funeral customs

There’s a fine row brewing in Cork. The County Council has forbidden the public to dig graves themselves, something they have been doing since the dawn of time.

Yes, it’s a health and safety thing. From now on graves may only be dug by those who have done the course. They must be equipped with approved equipment including ear defenders, mobile phones and underground cable detection tools. They must even have had the right jabs. It’s going to add around 500 euros to the cost of a funeral.

A local funeral director points out that “We have lots of old customs and old traditions and it is going to be very difficult to stop people doing what they always did.”

Yes indeed. The people of Myross have already struck back. They have posted a notice at their cemetery which reads:

In Myross, we dig for our own,

 

we shoulder our own

 

and we inter our own.


Our traditions and customs.

 

Your respect required.

 

Isn’t that great?

Whole story here.

 

Immerse yourself in Bath

23 March 2011
Charles
No comments
Categories: Academia and death

The Centre of Death and Society at the University of Bath is perhaps the UK’s leading think tank in the field of DDD (death, dying and disposal). That statement is challengeable, of course, and might be disputed by excellent thinkers in the field at York, Sheffield, Winchester and Durham. What do I know?

Every year they have a summer conference. This year it’s on June 25 and 26 – Saturday and Sunday.

Do you picture unfeasibly clever people with XL brains talking way over the top of your head in words several feet long? Well, it’s not like that. A dimwit like me can go and understand most of it and enjoy terrific chats over lunch and coffee about all things mortal. It’s a great occasion, genuinely inclusive and warmly welcoming of ordinary folk. It’s a highlight of my year.

So do consider signing up. The venue is cosy, there’s a huge car park 5 minutes’ walk away and Professor Walter will pay your tariff if you forget your money.

This year the theme is Death and Dying in the Digital Age. They want people to present papers. People like you, perhaps? Go on!!

I hope to see you there!

Here’s what they say:

The 2011 CDAS summer conference will examine how new interactive digital technologies affect the social relationships of those who are dying, mourners, and descendants. 20 minute papers are invited from researchers in HCI, design, the social sciences and humanities; software developers and entrepreneurs; and the caring, funeral and memorial professions. Abstracts (up to 250 words) to be emailed tocdas@bath.ac.uk by SUNDAY 27 MARCH 2011 (NEW EXTENDED DEADLINE). Topics could include, but are not limited to:

  • Dying: Do digital communications change the experience of dying? Dying people and/or their carers can communicate bad news or regular updates to their friends by e-mail, Facebook etc: does this differ from letters, telephone calls, etc? Do dying people’s blogs make the experience of dying less private than their earlier print equivalents? Do such technologies erode the so-called taboo of death?

  • Mourning: How do social networking sites (SNSs) change the experience of mourning? What is the online experience of communicating with the dead? Of talking with other mourners about the dead? Do SNSs re-insert mourners into community, if so how? Do they change the 20c experience of grief as private? How are they evolving?

  • Digital inheritance: How are protocols developing for the following, and what evidence is there of practice so far? Digital wills; SNS policies re deceased members; digital archiving; digital archaeology; the mortality/immortality of digital data

Web page here.

 

Co-operative Funeralcare puts its money on alkaline hydrolysis

23 March 2011
Charles
13 Comments
Categories: Uncategorised

From The Co-operative booklet (2011) My Legacy.  Ethical Strategy:

Throughout the 20th century, people in the UK were limited to the choice of either burial or cremation when dealing with a loved one’s remains. Now, in the early part of the 21st century, The Co-operative Funeralcare is putting significant resources behind the development of Resomation.® This new alternative uses an alkaline hydrolysis process and, like cremation, leaves behind a quantity of ash.

Resomation® has a number of environmental benefits including a reduction in the amount of energy needed in comparison to cremation, and a carbon footprint which is 35% less than cremation. The Co-operative Funeralcare is working towards having the process legally recognised throughout the UK.

Find out what you don’t know about Resomation here.

The, so far as I know, unpublished fact about Funeralcare’s interest in Resomation is that it owns 65 per cent of the company. My apologies to Funeralcare if this is confidential information.

In the light of this, we may speculate that Funeralcare regards alkaline hydrolysis as the technology which will depose cremation, confound its competitors and make its fortune.

What do you think of that?

 

Bretby crem sale a done deal

23 March 2011
Charles
6 Comments
Categories: Co-op, crematoria

Exactly why East Staffordshire Borough Council and South Derbyshire District Council, the representatives of the people of Buxton-upon-Trent, who are the owners of Bretby crematorium, should want to sell it on their behalf and without their say so, is a dark and nasty mystery. Bretby crem is profit-making, well run and highly regarded.

The sale was agreed by the councillors in a secret meeting. Why secret? The same Judas councillors are now in negotiation with Midlands Co-op, and they’re talking figures in the region of £8 million – a large sum for the Co-op to recoup. How are they going to do that? What’s in it for them?

Anxieties have been raised about monopoly issues.

Councillor Frank Bather, independent, has criticised the councils for ‘lack of communication’ – in other words, conspiratorial secrecy. He asks why no mention was made of the proposed sale in the borough council newsletter.

Here is the council’s dog-ate-my-homework explanation:

“We did have information about the sale in the newsletter when we were looking into it. Now the newsletter will not come out until after the elections. It is a timing thing.”

Bastards!

 

 

Swindler recycled

22 March 2011
Charles
7 Comments
Categories: Richard Sage

Members of the Official Richard Sage Fan Club will be interested to learn that our unwearied superdork has resurfaced. Richard Who? Click on the Category at the end of this post to trigger a cascade of ordure.

I can’t say exactly where he is — I must protect my source. But he is still in the UK and once more back in the private ambulance business. It was in his guise as a private ambulance operator that Sage swindled the NHS, his staff and his customers of hundreds of thousands of pounds some years ago, an irregularity of which M’lud took such a disapproving view that he banged him up for seven years.

I can today announce that I am in a position to effect the restoration of a sum of money to one of those who has been swindled by the much misunderstood Sage. Don’t ask how, it’s a long story, and it’s all devilishly above board.

If you have an outstanding CCJ against Mr Sage, please contact me. I’ll do what I can for you.

charles@goodfuneralguide.co.uk  /  07946 714 063

Sorry to be so cloak and dagger about this. It’s the only way the sting can succeed.

Bite-size news and gobbets of gossip

21 March 2011
Charles
1 Comment
Categories: Tweets

A roundup of the week’s news in tweets.

The intractable problem of boomer ageing and death. The elephant in the room – http://bit.ly/hjrw7T

Indy FD hits out at Bretby crem sale to Co-op. Rum biz, these crem sales – http://bit.ly/fSdWGX

Have just spoken to FD vs sale of Bretby crem. Very anti-Co-op with reason. Makes up for those who say I am too confrontational.

Photo 36 sums it all up really. http://ht.ly/4eftp #fb

If you should happen to die in Burton on Trent, use Murray’s FD. Incredibly lovely people. Worth dying in Burton for.

johannhari101 Johann Hari RT by GoodFunerals

Disturbing & obscene story about corporate homes for the elderly, with excellent investigative work by Olly Wright: http://ind.pn/fU9YIN

Will the Japanese have to cremate their tsunami dead on open-air pyres? http://bit.ly/dRjWwx

Will the Japanese have to cremate their tsunami dead on open-air pyres? http://bit.ly/dRjWwx

This new book examines why people travel to sacred spots. Looks really good – http://bit.ly/gmRSkY

Oldie reflects on ‘the slipperiness of time’. Delightful –http://bit.ly/dYy9Uk

Got your tickets for the SFU convention yet? Lovely blog post here –http://bit.ly/egundA

The Palace has just been on the phone. Rather good news, actually. Yes, we’re now Royal Good Funeral Guide.

Promo video from E of England Co-op. Wot, no sound? Look at that FD’s shoes!! Tsk. http://youtu.be/iUNtnrQ2HgE

Grievers plagued by wind – http://bit.ly/iaOAq8

“She was one of these women who loved TV medical dramas. She was virtually born to have a terminal disease!” http://bit.ly/dP57OP

New home funeral mag out now http://bit.ly/gAwyBl Published byhttp://bit.ly/LTveG More: http://bit.ly/i6wkrb Just ordered mine – $12

Funeral music: is the hymn dying out? Singers for Funerals discuss.http://bit.ly/fFW6IS

“Mourners at a funeral may not eat more than 3 sandwiches.” –http://bit.ly/fUfkHy

How to Die in Oregon. This looks really good. Death with dignity.http://bit.ly/dUeZKp & http://youtu.be/tB8yX3QmmVE

Might Dignity plc buy out LM Funerals? Makes a lot of sense. A few peripheral monopoly issues, but none that can’t be sold off – to FSP.

I’ve just found another undertaker who posts his prices on his website – http://bit.ly/ha9yPP

Australian cemeteries are turning into natural burial grounds – and folk don’t like it: http://bit.ly/frKWKA

Doing my bit to stop Bretby crem being sold into slavery –http://bit.ly/fbeMyo

Computerised book of remembrance like a visit to the cashpoint. Grievers’ fury – http://bit.ly/ejmBh0

Member of Japanese self-defence forces offers a prayer before removing body of a tsunami victim buried in the rubble –http://t.co/ogSFY

beachwordsmith Brian Jenner RT by GoodFunerals

RT @SARATHERAPY: The five regrets of the dying by Bronnie Ware, http://bit.ly/g86J0m > this is fab!

When you go into a care home you’ve got 832 days to live –http://bit.ly/hEIRYd

Tory bastards sell profitable crem to the damned Co-op for no visible good reason – http://bit.ly/htDB31

Rat chat

18 March 2011
Charles
3 Comments
Categories: Uncategorised

Can Twitter handle theology? No problem. This discussion took place idly over three days.

GoodFunerals Charles Cowling
“Our minister said God needed another angel in heaven, so he took my husband. But I needed my husband too. ” http://bit.ly/ggWU9Z

mylastsong My Last Song
@goodfunerals Heaven must be overcrowded with angels. It’s probably a very big place. Are pets allowed? Only good ones I guess. Who judges?

GoodFunerals Charles Cowling
@mylastsong Too many angels in Heaven? Should be declared a no-fly zone?

mylastsong My Last Song
@goodfunerals When not flying, they perch on a cloud, playing small harps. Could account for the cloudy weather. Are there pets in heaven?

GoodFunerals Charles Cowling
@mylastsong Of COURSE there are pets in heaven, MLS. Everyone knows that. All my dogs are waiting for me there.

mylastsong My Last Song
@goodfunerals Good. I was particularly fond of pet rat when a child. Hope he’s there too tho’ till now didn’t expect rodents in heaven.

GoodFunerals Charles Cowling
@mylastsong “In my Father’s house there are many mansions.” There’s a rat mansion for sure. Death offers so much to look forward to.

mylastsong My Last Song
@goodfunerals Unless you’re the person who cleans the rat mansion. Bum deal, get to heaven to be told you’re in charge of the rat mansion.

GoodFunerals Charles Cowling
@mylastsong Celestial rats self-cleaning, mansion tickety-boo, call as you please.

mylastsong My Last Song
@goodfunerals Not sure I believe buy generic cialis professional this now Charles. I’d hoped heaven was a sort of better earth, me and ratty reunited if G in a good mood.

GoodFunerals Charles Cowling
@mylastsong Awfully sorry, old sport, but Big G wedded to many mansions policy – separate development. Obdurate in these enlightened times.

mylastsong My Last Song
@goodfunerals Possibly the other place more fun. Lots of mixing together in all that heat more appealing than stuck in mansion with worthies

GoodFunerals Charles Cowling
@mylastsong Ratty will be trapped in the Empyrean hymning the Supreme Being, forever parted. IS THIS WHAT YOU WANT?

mylastsong My Last Song
@goodfunerals I put him in a cage, overfed him, teased him, ignored him most of the time. I JUST WANT HIM TO BE HAPPY NOW and await my fate.

GoodFunerals Charles Cowling
@mylastsong Man proposes, God disposes. Ratty sleeps sound in the arms of the Lord. The Last Trump will decide if you are a sheep or a goat.

mylastsong My Last Song
@goodfunerals So my fate to be a sheep or a goat sharing the Lord’s embrace with lots of sleeping rats. If this heaven, what’s hell?

mylastsong My Last Song
@goodfunerals Ratty has best deal. When awake lives in self cleaning mansion, then into arms of Lord to sleep. I’m a sheep or goat. Fairenuf

GoodFunerals Charles Cowling
@mylastsong Amen. In unsure and uncertain hope.

mylastsong My Last Song
@goodfunerals Amen.

Cads’ ads

18 March 2011
Charles
2 Comments
Categories: Transparency of ownership

Blog follower Simon Irons, whose last comment on a post was very bracing, is keeping watch over the ASA site to see what happens in the case of Liverpool’s independent funeral directors vs the Fairways Partnership. I expect Fairways will get off — they employ very good lawyers. But win or lose, the complainants ought to be able to get some good publicity out of it.

While waiting for something to happen, Simon has done a spot of very useful rummaging. He has unearthed other cases of recent ads reported to the ASA. Here are the links:


http://asa.org.uk/ASA-action/Adjudications/2011/1/Lodge-Bros-(Funerals)-Ltd/TF_ADJ_49600.aspx

http://asa.org.uk/ASA-action/Adjudications/2011/3/Nigel-Chamberlain–Partners-Ltd/TF_ADJ_49923.aspx

http://asa.org.uk/ASA-action/Adjudications/2006/5/Church-View-Funeral-Service-Ltd/CS_41243.aspx

http://asa.org.uk/ASA-action/Adjudications/2010/9/LM-Funerals/TF_ADJ_49081.aspx

http://asa.org.uk/ASA-action/Adjudications/2011/3/Richard-Steel–Partners-Ltd/TF_ADJ_49930.aspx

http://asa.org.uk/ASA-action/Adjudications/2011/3/AH-Cheater-Ltd/TF_ADJ_49929.aspx

 

Hats off to you, Simon! Thank you!

Earth to Earth

17 March 2011
Charles
3 Comments
Categories: natural burial

I flew down the M5 last night to attend a glittering film premiere at Arnos Vale. That’s Arnos as in the Lancastrian ‘tha knows’, it doesn’t rhyme with thermos, I heard a bit of that from foreigners who’d come up from Bath. Sorry, no idea who Arno was. Correctly it should be Arno’s. Enough quibbling. I like the M5, it is the holiday motorway. And my wife is a Bristolian; her gran and granfer are buried in Arno’s Vale and I had instructions to say hello to them. Everything about the expedition was promising.

As darkness fell I felt no regret that the cemetery would be in blackout when I got there. I hate Victorian cemeteries with their vainglorious monuments to rich dead guys – though I do get an unquestionably questionable kick out of seeing them succumb to oblivion, the tendrils reaching up, the kerbs burst by insouciant weeds, the statuary slowly nosediving.

In the darkness it actually looks lovely – feels Italian. I may have to re-think after seeing it once more in daylight. They’ve just spent £4.8 million restoring it – but I think there are question marks over its sustainability now that the money is spent and they must generate an income. I did manage to see the old cremator in the basement of the Non-conformist chapel. I hoped to be able to find a photo of it but can’t. Well worth a look if you’re a death anorak, and there’s a bonus, they still have their original cremulator, a huge and cumbersome Heath Robinson construction capable probably of pulverising Kryptonite.

The film premiere was in the Anglican mortuary chapel. No red carpet, no paps, no screaming, but they were all there all the same, the megastars of death: Ken West, who begat natural burial;Rosie Inman-Cook of the NDC; James Leedam of Native Woodland; Ian Quance, president of the ICCM; Stephen Laing, the man who created the Bereavement Services portal, and his wife; Professor Tony Walter and a very nice PhD student I met at last year’s CDAS summer conference whose name I have forgotten. Much nattering ensued. Ian Quance is the bereavement services supremo in Exeter. He offers his clients a menu a bit like those menus you get in some Chinese restaurants. On it are pictures of graves in various states of decoration. You choose the one you like and your dead person gets buried with folk of similar aesthetic values and doesn’t get encircled by Poundlandish neighbours — unless he/she is Poundlandish, of course. What a good idea, we all said. “It’s not for me,” he said, “to tell people how to grieve.” Then we were hushed.

Hannah Rumble, who has recently finished her PhD at Durham University, talked about natural burial and gave us some interesting historical perspectives on it. Then she showed us the film Earth to Earth, which was recently shot by Sarah Thomas, a visual anthropologist, and was created with some input from  Hannah as an academic consultant at the pre-production stage, and Prof. Douglas Davis, who has written some very good books and is a very nice man. 

The film explores “the concepts, motivations and behaviours aligned with the case study natural burial site known as Barton Glebe, located a few miles West of Cambridge, and one of only two natural burial sites in the UK affiliated to the Church of England.” Lots of interviews with people saying why they like it and what it means to them. Beautifully made, lots to think about, and a great advertisement for natural burial except possibly for the bit where the C of E man says it’s not just for dropouts, which made Ken splutter a bit. All in all we loved it and someone said it ought to be on the telly. Well done, Hannah. Especially well done Sarah, who did the hard camerawork! You can find Sarah’s blog here.

Quotes of the night were from Tony Walter. He observed that, so far has nature reclaimed Arno’s Vale, it is itself an example of natural burial, albeit an ironic one. Then he reflected that the Brits took to cremation early, and invented (reinvented) natural burial. Why so innovative? Because we don’t re-use grave spaces as they do on the continent – we darn well have to be. Gosh he’s bright. He’ll go far.