The GFG Awards, 7 September 2012

The GFG Awards will be the first-ever industry awards ceremony. We have received 149 nominations for 14 categories, so it’s a very strong field. More details any time soon. First, though, our thanks to Steve Ancrum and the brilliant team at Sunset Coffins, who are donating funeral Oscars, like the one above, each of which will be presented, individually engraved with the winner’s name, on the night.

Full details of the evening plus an opportunity to buy tickets and book specially discounted accommodation here

Seeing it through

In the summer edition of the Oldie magazine (strapline: ‘Everybody buys it eventually’), Mavis Nicholson discusses the case for the ‘right to die’. She says:

I had a conversation with an even more elderly chap than me, a GP all his working life, who was in very bad shape. He said he thought it was too potentially dangerous to allow people to choose their death or for relatives to have a say in the matter — or doctors and nurses for that matter. “It’s not that I don’t trust people,” he told me. “On the whole I do, though I think I am pretty wily and watchful as well.” No, he thought we should see it through to the end. “That’s what I have done in my family affairs,” he said “through all the trials and tribulations there have been in that quarter. I fought in the last war and saw that through with gritted teeth, I must admit. My job has been very full on, but in the end I am glad I have seen my way through the undergrowth and found life’s clearings, you might say. And I’ll see myself into the final clearing, I hope.”

Thoughts of a funeral-goer

Posted by Lyra Mollington

When my first grandchild was born, I decided I would like to be called Grandma.  Fortunately the other grandmother decided she would prefer to be called Nanna. 

A few years later, I overheard my grandchildren Sebastian and Chloe talking about their ‘other grandmother’ and they were calling her Nice Nanna.  Intrigued, I wondered if perhaps I had been given a similar title, although I doubted if the vocabulary of two infant school children stretched to adjectives like ‘Glamorous’ or ‘ Gregarious’.  And it was highly unlikely that they would call me ‘Gentle Grandma.’ 

No, it was none of the above.  I was…Nutty Nanna. 

Two weeks ago Nice Nanna died.  Joyce was a lovely lady.  Mr M took a real shine to her from their first meeting.  And our daughter Jamie adored her. 

The funeral took place on Wednesday.  The undertaker had told Joyce’s family that they were ‘lucky’ to be able to have the funeral so soon because he was ‘rushed off his feet’ and the crematorium was ‘chocker’!  It seems that to have to wait only ten days after someone dies is ‘a result’. 

I didn’t know Joyce well.  We had met on only a few special occasions.  She was happily divorced and looked considerably younger than her seventy two years.  The more I heard about her, the more I thought that perhaps Naughty Nanna might be a more suitable title.

I wasn’t sure whether the relationship was close enough to justify my attendance at the funeral.  My daughter’s mother-in-law.  Nanna to my grandchildren.  And it’s such an awkward journey to Woking crematorium.

Of course I went!  Woking Crematorium is the oldest in the country.  The parking is terrible and to Mr M’s embarrassment we were nearly turned away by a young man on the gate who pointed sternly to the ‘Car Park Full’ sign nearby.  However, when I asked him to have another look, a space miraculously appeared. 

It’s an adorable chapel – and NO curtains.  Instead there’s a small brass door and the coffin moves through it, as if by magic, at the critical moment.  The organist sits high above the congregation on a balcony, together with any overflow of mourners.

Joyce’s family had chosen a traditional send-off with a lady vicar.  She was very brisk giving the impression that she was late for another (much more important) engagement.  Her name was either Beverley or Brenda.  It wasn’t on the order of service and I have to confess I wasn’t listening properly – I was too busy trying to spot Joyce’s boyfriends.

Our granddaughter read a poem.  I was very proud but made a mental note to tell Chloe that I would prefer a less sentimental reading when it’s my turn.  On second thoughts, perhaps best not to say anything.

Joyce’s younger brother read the eulogy.  He cleverly avoided any mention of ‘the divorce’ and ‘the boyfriends’ – one of whom I’m fairly sure had hidden himself away on the balcony with the organist.  Nevertheless, it was an affectionate tribute and Geoffrey held it together very well.  Except for the last bit.  People will insist on ending a tribute with sentences like, ‘You were such a kind and caring person, adored by everyone.  We will miss you so much – thank you for everything you did for us.’  Geoffrey crumbled at the word ‘kind’.  Without waiting for him to compose himself, the vicar said the rest of the words for him. 

One hymn.  Yes, All Things Bright And Beautiful.  I’m sure that hymn has it in for me.  It pops up at almost every funeral I attend.  Fortunately the organist played it in the key of C so I didn’t have to stretch my vocal chords too much.

The final piece of music was Get Happy, an extremely lively show tune.  At ‘Forget your troubles,’ Brisk Lady Vicar was at the door like a bat out of hell.  I had to smile when I noticed that she was struggling with the handle.  (‘Get ready for the Judgement Day…’)  She gave up and waited for someone to help her.  I was pleased to see that the young lady chapel attendant was in no hurry to assist.  She walked slowly along the aisle (‘We’re going to the promised land…’).  When she was in line with the brass door, she bowed (‘It’s all so peaceful on the other side…’) and finally rescued the BLV (‘The Lord is waiting to take your hand…).

Once outside, I made a bee-line for our grandchildren, Seb and Chloe, to comfort them.  They may be grown-ups but they still appreciate a hug from Nutty Nanna.

What complaining through the Funeral Arbitration Scheme feels like

From: Beverley Webb
Sent: 15 August 2012 23:03
To: Weymouth Abbotsbury Rd (TCF)
Subject: Gloria Roper
Importance: High

Dear Ms Allen

We are writing to request you send us a copy of the estimate of costs of our late mother’s funeral and copies of the agreement we signed in your office in Weymouth on December 8th 2011, you can email these to the address’s provided below

michellelesleyblakesley@

weebie71@

Sincerely

Michelle Blakesley

Beverley Webb

From: funeral.clientrelations@letsco-operate.com
To: michellelesleyblakesley@...; weebie71@...
CC: info@nafd.org.uk
Date: Mon, 20 Aug 2012 16:56:38 +0100
Subject: FW: Gloria Roper

Dear Mrs Blakesley

Thank you for your enquiry.

I have received a copy of your completed Conciliation Service Application Form from the Funeral Arbitration Scheme and have therefore re-opened your complaint. I will be reviewing our records and the previously agreed resolution to your concerns and have therefore requested all copies of documentation from our Weymouth Funeral Home. Once I am in receipt of the relevant documentation I will of course submit two copies together with the Funeral Directors Dispute Detail form that was attached to your application form, the Funeral Arbitration Scheme will provide you with a copy in due course.

May I respectfully request that any further correspondence in relation to your complaint is directed to the Funeral Arbitration Scheme at info@nafd.org.uk in the first instance or alternatively to funeral.clientrelations@letsco-operate.com for my attention.

Kind regards

Jon Potts

Client Relations Manager

Co-operative Funeralcare

From: Beverley Webb [mailto:weebie71@...]
Sent: 22 August 2012 10:04
To: Funeral Client Relations; info@nafd.org.ukmichellelesleyblakesley@...
Subject: RE: Gloria Roper – Att Jon Potts

Dear Mr Potts

Please can you explain why you have chosen not to disclosure paperwork we have requested directly from you and that we did not receive at the time of signing on December 8th 2011 at your Weymouth Co-operative Branch in Dorset with the manager Hellen Allen present  following the sudden death of our mother.

Please can you further explain was it is necessary for the Funeral Arbitration Scheme to provide us with this in due course, We will look forward to a prompt reply

Sincerely

Michelle Blakesley & Beverley Webb

From: funeral.clientrelations@letsco-operate.com
To: weebie71@...
CC: info@nafd.org.ukDavid.Collingwood@co-operative.coop
Date: Wed, 22 Aug 2012 15:18:08 +0100
Subject: RE: Gloria Roper – Att Jon Potts

Dear Mrs Webb

Thank you for your email.

As I explained in my previous email, now that the matter has been passed to the Funeral Arbitration Scheme (FAS), I have requested all documentation from the funeral home. Once I have received this I will be in a position to complete the Funeral Directors Dispute Detail form that was attached to your application form and submit it together with duplicate copies of all our correspondence and documentation. This is usual practice.

I will ask FAS to forward a duplicate copy of the correspondence. This ensures that you have an exact duplicate of all documentation submitted to FAS by Funeralcare and that there are no discrepancies in the copy that you receive.

Kind regards

Jon Potts

Client Relations Manager

Co-operative Funeralcare

Editor’s note: personal email addresses have been obscured so that Beverley and Michelle do not receive ‘unsolicited’ correspondence. We will bring you updates as and when. 

 

 

 

 


 


 

 


 

Sea la vie

From the Guardian, 1 July 2011:

For three soothing weeks in autumn, the endless roaring traffic on London’s Euston Road, one of the most choked and grime-polluted in the capital, will have competition: the sound of waves breaking and pebbles crunching, relayed live from Chesil beach in Dorset and wrapped in a sound sculpture around the Wellcome Collection building.

Ken Arnold, head of public programmes at the Wellcome, said: “Bill Fontana [who created the installation called White Sound] brilliantly confuses our sense of where we are and what we are experiencing. Just by closing our eyes he manages to turn one of Europe’s nosiest and most polluted roads into a live seascape. It will be fascinating to see how the public responds to the English Channel crashing on to the Euston Road outside the Wellcome Collection.”

Fontana is based in San Francisco, but has installed sound sculptures all over the world, including filling the Arc de Triomphe in Paris with the sound of waves crashing on the D-Day landing beaches on the Normandy coast.

He has already used Chesil beach in a piece for the Maritime Museum at Greenwich, south London, where visitors are surprised to encounter the sound of waves welling up from the grass as they walk along the path to the landlocked museum devoted to the history of the sea.

It’d make a nice backdrop for ‘silent reflection’ in funeral services — or for a committal, especially for a sea-lover. As Sue Gill said on this blog a fortnight or so ago: 

A text that really resonates for me is from John F. Kennedy’s book The Sea which he wrote in 1962:  ‘ I really don’t know why it is that all of us are so committed to the sea. I think it’s because we all came from the sea. It is an extremely interesting biological fact that all of us have in our veins the exact same percentage of salt in our blood that exists in the ocean. And therefore we have salt in our blood, in our sweat, in our tears. We are tied to the ocean, and when we go back to the sea we are going back from whence we came.’

Memorials of shame

Posted by Richard Rawlinson

The world is full of memorials to those who have left it, from the Pyramids of Egypt and India’s Taj Mahal to benches on the Promenade in Brighton and central Berlin’s Memorial to the Murdered Jews of Europe.

The latter, by architect Peter Eisenman, has been criticised for being too abstract and for not presenting historical information in the form of plaques or religious symbols. It’s also, of course, been dismissed by Iranian President Ahmadinejad, a Holocaust denier who continues to threaten the destruction of Israel.

But many find it beautiful and moving. Consisting of 2,711 large, plain, rectangular stones of varying heights over five acres of undulating land, some visitors compare the slabs to coffins, others to concentration camp huts. They can walk through the labyrinth of pathways between the slabs, which aims to evoke feelings of loss and disorientation.

Modern Germany should be applauded as one of the few nations brave and humble enough to erect memorials to immortalise its own shame.

Near the Holocaust memorial, Berlin authorities have also unveiled a Memorial to Homosexuals Persecuted Under Nazism. It consists of a stone cuboid, on the front of which is a window through which visitors can see a short film of two kissing men. The window has been smashed by vandals on at least two occasions, and there have also been complaints by lesbians over the absence of women kissing. Lesbians victimised under Nazism have not been documented, though there are instances recorded of lesbian pubs being forced to close.

Berlin’s eagerness to make amends for Germany’s 20th century crimes continues with long-delayed plans for a memorial commemorating some 500,000 murdered gypsies (Sinti and Roma). The design is a small pool of water with a triangular island in the middle displaying a Roma rose.

This time, bickering is holding up completion, with disagreements between installation artist Dani Karavan and the council client over issues of construction materials and expenses.

Pity those who sit on memorial committees. Maybe Berlin should have built one memorial for all Nazi victims. Or perhaps not.

Please, sir, can I have the skeleton?

The case of Christopher Harris vs Woodstock Town Council focussed the not inconsiderable minds of the GFG workforce on the vital necessity of forwarding all tricky legal enquiries straight to Teresa Evans, thence to John Bradfield if necessary. While we are often to be found curled up with a copy of Davies Law of Burial, Cremation and Exhumation and a nice cup of tea, we have not Teresa or John’s nous nor yet their stamina. To understand the law is to read and re-read til you’ve got it… then (this is the important bit; Teresa told me this) go back and read between the lines.

Christopher’s case focussed our minds on the legal status of ashes. This may well have been determined by the Burial Act 1857 which requires dead people to enjoy eternal rest, and only to be moved with permission:

Except in the cases where a body is removed from one consecrated place of burial to another by faculty granted by the ordinary for that purpose, it shall not be lawful to remove any body, or the remains of any body, which may have been interred in any place of burial, without licence under the hand of one of Her Majesty’s Principal Secretaries of State, and with such precautions as such Secretary of State may prescribe as the condition of such licence; and any person who shall remove any such body or remains, contrary to this enactment, or who shall neglect to observe the precautions prescribed as the condition of the licence for removal, shall, on summary conviction before any two justices of the peace, forfeit and pay for every such offence a sum not exceeding level 1 on the standard scale. (Source: Teresa; our bold)

What follows could well be plumb wrong, so please correct me as unkindly as you wish. It’d be good to get to the bottom of this.

The state takes charge of the disposal of the dead for two reasons: 1) to protect public health and 2) to maintain public decency. Neither of these reasons would seem necessarily to account for the Burial Act 1857’s insistence on 3) ensuring eternal rest for those who are dead and buried. Is this a Christian thing stemming from the belief that the soul is embodied? Perhaps it simply derives from the Roman prescript that ‘the only lawful possessor of a dead body is the earth’.

Anyone wanting to engage in a rite of secondary treatment, as many Greeks do (they dig up the skeleton after 3-5 years, wash it and take it away for reburial), is forbidden. You can only dig up a dead person if you have a faculty from the bishop or a licence from the Home Office (or is that the MoJ?). Having done that, to the earth it must return.

The Burial Act 1857  preceded the Cremation Act of 1902, and did not envisage cremated human remains. When cremation became the alternative to burial it became the practice to allow applicants for cremation to have possession of cremated remains to do with as they saw fit. This makes sense — up to a point. Ashes are neither a threat to public health nor are they an affront to public decency. But what about the requirement for eternal rest? What about ‘the only lawful possessor of a dead body is the earth’?

Well, that requirement seems to have persisted in the case of ashes which are interred in a cemetery. Local Authorities Cemeteries Order 1977, which applies to public cemeteries, defines “burial” as including both “human remains” and “cremated human remains”.  These interments are recorded in the burial register and there can only be an exhumation with a faculty or a licence. An exception, it seems, is Northern Ireland, where the recording of an ashes burial is at the discretion of the cemetery manager.

Germany followed a more consistent line and insists that ashes, almost without exception, are buried in a sealed container in a cemetery — yet it interrupts eternal repose for buried bodies after around thirty years to make room for someone else. In England and Wales (don’t know about Scotland), all we have to do to arrange for the interment of ashes is to produce the (easily opened) container together with a certificate of cremation. The identity of the ashes is not verified; they could be cat litter. As Jonathan Taylor has oberved: “I’ve buried some dodgy-looking fine yellowish dust that looked to me nothing like cremated remains, and which was found on a bookcase and had a cremation certificate ‘found’ for it at a nearby crematorium by a conscientious sleuthing undertaker but with absolutely no evidence of any connection between the two.”

If you scatter ashes, you are not required to record the location, even in a cemetery. What, then, constitutes an interment? Again, as I understand it, the MoJ’s clarification of the Burial Act as it applies to cremated human remains is that they must be in a container and constitute a ‘discernible mass’. Scatter them in the bottom of a spouse’s coffin, and no permission is required; tuck them in a container under the spouse’s arm and you need someone’s say-so.

If you know better, please say.

All cemeteries experience Monday morning molehill syndrome: the appearance of wee freshly dug mounds on graves where, who knows, ashes have been interred while no one’s looking. It may be the case that some good-hearted funeral directors encourage or conspire with their clients to do it, depriving our cemeteries of valuable revenue stream. 

Footnote: The Burial Act 1857 also “exempt[s] from Toll every Person going to or returning from attending the Funeral of any Person who shall be buried in any Burial Ground provided for the Parish, Township, or Place in which he died.” So you know what to say next time you want a free ride over the Clifton suspension bridge or along the M6 Toll. 

Body or ashes at the funeral?

Posted by Richard Rawlinson

As a blogger, I may seem as impervious to the ways of secular funerals as a civil celebrant is to the customs of Catholicism. But as a reader, I’ve mulled over ideas presented here to find they’ve struck a chord. While unprejudiced readers will already realise I value choice, whether religious or non-religious, it’s perhaps less obvious I can hold more than an ‘each to their own’ attitude, that instead of simply ‘agreeing to differ’, I sometimes ‘agree to agree’.

Poppy Mardall’s ‘Free yourself and take your time’ is a recent example of a blog that’s provided food for thought—for which I’m grateful. Discussing the service of her company, Poppy’s Funerals, she wrote that, after a simple cremation, ‘we then deliver the ashes to the family so they can hold the funeral ceremony, celebration of life or memorial with the ashes wherever, whenever and however they want’. 

As someone who reveres Church teaching, who tries (but sometimes fails) to obey the fundamentals of the faith, a funeral without the body is not something to be embraced lightly.

The Order of Christian Funerals directly links funerals to the Baptism and Confirmation journey: ‘This is the body once washed in Baptism, anointed with the oil of salvation, and fed with the Bread of Life’. It goes on to say ‘the human body is so inextricably associated with the human person that it is hard to think of a human person apart from his or her body. Thus, the Church’s reverence and care for the body grows out of a reverence and concern for the person whom the Church now commends to the care of God.’

Many here, of course, won’t give a fig about the granting of Church permission for steps taken at funerals. A non-Catholic has no need to consult an oracle which he/she doesn’t hold as a theological authority, and no doubt finds anathema such willing resignation of independence. As a Catholic though, I felt the need to check with doctrinal teaching to see if my sympathy with the option of a funeral without the body was okay or an error.

Until just 50 years ago, the Church forbad cremation due to the belief in the body as the temple of the Holy Spirit. In 1963, she waived this law, an example of how rituals of the Church adapt to the cultural needs of members as long as this doesn’t sacrifice basic beliefs. The Church continues to prefer and encourage the faithful to bury the dead, but supports the faithful in honouring the life of the departed in this different way. She accepts ‘one hat doesn’t necessarily fit all’, and this alternative isn’t a rejection of core values.

When the Church accepted cremations, she initially still required they be carried out only after the actual body was present at the funeral Mass. Ashes were not allowed in church as substitute for the body due to reverence for the body which carried the oils from Baptism and Confirmation.

However, in 1997, the Church recognised the need of relatives of those who had chosen cremation to have a tangible presence of the deceased during a post-cremation funeral Mass. She lifted the ban on having ashes present during the service.

This lenience was triggered by cases such as a person who dies suddenly a long way from home, and the family can’t afford to repatriate the body. The body is then cremated near the location of death, and the urn of ashes transported home more affordably. It then seemed insensitive to refuse those mourners a funeral mass with the ashes present. A memorial mass may be a comfort but some feel there’s something missing at the funeral mass without the presence of deceased in at least some form.

Despite condoning cremations and funeral masses with ashes—although still preferring burial of the body—the Church continues to forbid the faithful from scattering cremains or displaying them at home, insisting they be buried within an urn in a cemetery.

Footnote: Rome had to make minor revisions to liturgy to accommodate the new choices. The Order of Christian Funerals prescribes three separate rites to celebrate the journey from this life to the next, and to help mourners through this period of separation and letting go. The ideal sequence of this trio of rites is vigil (short prayer service at the bedside or funeral home), funeral mass (full mass in church), committal (short prayer service at the graveside or crematorium). Cremation before the funeral requires the vigil, committal (of sorts), funeral mass with urn of cremains present instead of body in coffin, committal proper (in cemetery). Prayers, therefore, no longer make specific reference to the body that was washed in Baptism, but to ‘earthly remains’. 

Temporary temples

Posted by Rupert Callender

If the sun shines in between the deluge, the next few days should see armies of combine harvesters moving across the land, particularly in Wiltshire, the UK’s breadbasket, bringing in the harvest, and bringing this year’s crop circle season to a close, too.

After a slow start it has built to be a fine year as the delicate relationship between the people who make them, the people who interpret them and the people who, well, consume them continues to hold– just.

This most misunderstood of art forms has followed a pattern for over twenty years now, with the beginning of the summer seeing simple designs which build in complexity as the season progresses. There are two main reasons for this. The vast geometric patterns look much better incised into mature wheat, the edges are crisper and, from the air, the flattened golden crop reflects the light back with a picturesque metallic gleam, but mainly because the lengthening nights give the teams of up to twelve people much more time for their work, and work it certainly is.

This one below is state of the art, a vast Buddhist mandala, a never ending knot obviously made by one of the best teams in the world, probably the notorious Circlemakers, loathed by the croppies, the name given to the people who are certain that the circles are made by something other than human, but also controversial within the secretive community of artists who make them because of their commercial work — logos for Mitsubishi, Shredded Wheat, and idents for TV companies.

Controversial they may be, but nobody denies they are accomplished, and this exquisite circle shows all of the skill and breathtaking beauty that is their hallmark. They are not alone at the top of their game, but there aren’t many teams that can pull off something like this. Few have done as much to further the game, endlessly pushing the boundaries of what is considered possible, giving the researchers the reasons they need to insist on outside forces.

Of course the croppies view them as almost satanic. They believe that if these teams exist at all, who of course keep a low profile, because any circle that has a confirmed authorship immediately loses any power it has, then they are malicious disinformation stooges of some shadowy military elite, determined to keep ordinary folk from the awesome truth of about the circles. Nothing could be further from the truth. True, deception is necessary to imbue the circles with their extraordinary power, qualities that can have visitors swooning, or feeling nauseous, or being spontaneously healed of longstanding injuries, but their impulses are less to fool than to create a liminal space where odd things can happen, and do with spooky regularity.

In the criminally undersold book The Field Guide, the art, history and philosophy of crop circle making, published by Strange Attractor, who also publish the fifth edition of The Natural Death Handbook, author and circlemaker Rob Irving explains that what people are having when they enter a crop circle is a reaction to a work of art, but because they don’t know it’s art, they attribute the emotions it produces to something else, often with a strong spiritual subtext, and this is what gives the circles their enduring hook. They create transcendence, a simple and uplifting emotional surge that can feel like being initiated into a huge secret, a revelation that incredible things happen, hidden in plain view.

In between the tired and dew damp teams leaving a circle just as the sky is lightening, and the first wide eyed croppie entering the design, something profound happens which tells us more about things like homeopathy, belief, peer pressure and religious experience than almost anything else in our modern world. It is an extraordinary experiential game, a sociologist’s dream, the echo of our own curiousity that has changed lives for better and worse and significantly shaped our modern culture in the short time since a UFO obsessed nature artist persuaded his drinking partner to spend their Friday night after the pub making indentations in the corn, partly to fool the world into thinking a spaceship had landed, but with unmistakable devotional undertones, an attempt to call down the aliens he longed to meet.

What an incredible phenomenon to create from nothing, for camera batteries do fail in them, odd earth lights do zoom about the corridors of wheat, synchronicites build until it makes your ears pop, you really do feel like the New Jerusalem is just behind a veil in front of you, and with a bit of courage and faith you can pop through it.

All well and good I hear you cry, but what relevance to funerals does this have?

Well, for me, crop circles have played a profound part in shaping what I believe and, more importantly, how I believe it.

When my mother was dying in the mid nineties and I was at my most shaky, veering between a nervous and a hedonistic breakdown, crop circles provided a neat religious ledge to cling to, so unlike the reassurances of a Christian afterlife that failed to comfort me as when, as a seven year old, I had to process my father’s death. I so wanted to believe that the behind the circles was something amazing; aliens, Gaia, interdimensional beings dripping with spiritual resonance, and for several years that opportunity flourished. Some of the weirdest experiences of my life happened around crop circles.

Luckily for me, my gradual acceptance that they were actually made by extremely clever artists, interacting with and imbedded in the community they were ‘fooling’, didn’t plunge me into despair or denial as it has so many. If anything it deepened my interest. It also finally cut out a way of fluffy thinking that had been keeping me in childhood, an infantile yearning for cosmic intervention that reaches back to ideas of the Rapture and that permeates conspiracy culture. Not everything has fifty shades of grey, sometimes there is a right answer and a wrong answer, and it feels good to choose.

But at the heart of the phenomenon is a surprisingly pure centre that isn’t about deception or solving a riddle but, instead, is about making a space to step outside of our lives for a moment, the creation of a sacred space from scratch. One of the photographers involved in the scene, part of the multi stranded, multi million pound industry that has evolved alongside the phenomenon, calls them ‘temporary temples’, and this term neatly sums it all up. The circle makers are creating the space for people to have their own religious experience, a simple and profound act of creation that allows the believer to superimpose their own belief system on top. They are a spiritual Rorschach test, reflecting back what we want them too.

Hopefully, there is nothing deceptive about the way we create our funeral ceremonies; indeed we pride ourselves on creating entirely transparent rituals that rely on nothing more than honesty and connection. Nonetheless, we try to create an atmosphere in which people feel unexpectedly moved by the feeling of the ritual, a sense of profound connection to each other, and to the reality of the situation that comes from standing together in a temporary temple, held up by nothing more than love and each other.  Humanity make circles – of stone, or wheat or flesh – and in the middle of these circles something wonderful can happen, even if it’s just our fellow human beings finally coming into focus.