No-win
“In the UK, the size and number of cremators at a crematorium are selected to enable the ‘duty’ to be accomplished within a normal working day and so the cremator is used for about 8 hours per day and then shut down until the next day. This is not an energy-efficient way of working, and […]
The many lessons to be learned from Mortonhall
The report into the Mortonhall ashes scandal was released yesterday. To refresh your memory: from 1967 until 2011 parents of babies who had died antenatally or perinatally in Edinburgh were informed, on the authority of Mortonhall crematorium, that there would be no ashes after cremation. All the while (since 1934, actually) two privately-owned Edinburgh crematoria, Seafield and Wariston, […]
Don’t stop all the clocks
Posted by Baggaman Yesterday Quokkagirl had a go at crappy crematoria. Fair do’s. But it’s not all bad. Take the time limit. Is that a restraint or a constraint? A restraint is bad, something to be got round. A constraint is good. The best art, literature and music are inspired by self-imposed constraints. The haiku, […]
Crème de la crem
A rant by Quokkagirl Imagine if you will – a member of the mourning congregation spends the funeral ceremony of a dear 100 year old friend, listening intently to me …..….awaiting his cue. When the cue comes, he leaves his role as a mourner to fiddle with his mp3 player (which he’d had to go […]
Be smart – follow the money
In all so-called advanced cultures, funeral practices are becoming less elaborate. All this talk of baby boomers reinventing funerals as bespoke, themed, accessorised, more or less lavish performance events can seem to make good sense — but baby boomers, who by now have buried and cremated many thousands of parents, ain’t, experience now tells us, […]
Vanishing point – what’s the best method?
Guest post by Steve Every funeral at a crematorium will have a point at which the coffin is removed from the sight of the mourners, usually during the committal. To start off with, is there an optimal speed of removing the coffin from view? Some curtains close in just 10 seconds, which may be […]
We need no more out of town death malls
Q: What’s Big Money to do? The industry big beasts, Dignity and Co-op, can’t make scale pay except by hiking prices (this may be incompetence). And funeral plans are beginning to look… well, decidedly subprime. A: Burn, baby, burn! Yes, buying and building crematoria is the Next Big Thing in Funeralworld. Already we’re in the […]
‘Eager yet kindly’ flames
Posted by Richard Rawlinson After her funeral service at St Paul’s Cathedral last week, Margaret Thatcher was driven to Mortlake Crematorium in west London before the committal of her ashes alongside her beloved Denis at the Royal Hospital Chelsea. Mortlake is a pleasant 1930s building surrounded by peaceful, landscaped gardens. HG Wells, who cremated his wife […]
EXCLUSIVE: It’s going to be one wacky sendoff for Downton’s Matthew
The GFG can exclusively reveal that Downton star Matthew Crawley will be cremated in a way-out guerilla funeral on the ancestral estate in a ritual created by the grief-stricken family. Devotees of toff-soap Downton Abbey were left dazed and heartbroken at the end of the 2012 Christmas special when heir Matthew Crawley was violently killed […]
Spray paint marks the spot
Story in The Times Staff at Mortonhall crematorium, Edinburgh, have since 1967 been telling families that no ashes can be retrieved from the cremation of babies who die at or around the time of birth. They have been secretly burying the ashes in a mass grave. We covered this here. In response to public outrage, […]
